"Is it ever okay to be selfish?" she asked
"Well..."
I replied. "What is Your definition of selfish?"
"When you do
things only for yourself? Or When you think only about yourself, without
considering others?"
"Hmm..." I thought.
But is there really
anyone who isn't?
One way or the other the underlying reason for the things we
do are our own selves. Thinking about all the things I've done I can only
conclude one thing; I did them because they served ME somehow. When I visit a
friend, help someone, call to check on my neighbour, give out to charity; all
these may have been deeds for others but in reality they were for ME. I did
them because they either made me happy, brought me peace, put a smile on my
face, cleared my conscience, made me feel at ease, or even for the reward
promised by Allah for every atom of good deed, so He would look down upon Me
with His mercy & be pleased Me
Some people get their happiness from other
people's pain, while other's cannot find peace knowing they've hurt a soul.
Some people are nourished by giving love & sharing what they have, while
others find joy in stashing billions in their bank accounts.
But I think If you
could only recognize what your soul truly needs, if you could recognise it's
source of true peace, and the connection between you & every soul out there
you'll find that what you do for others serves you too. You'll find that in
order to have more peace & happiness, you need to share some with others
too. In order to be safe & secure, you need to save, help & protect
others too.
It's like the farmer who gives his neighbour some of his good seeds
recognizing that His seeds would have more chances of surviving &
maintaining their quality if they're neighbours were good seeds too, not prone
to infestation or disease that could spread to them.
And what if i told you
that your chances to succeed were tied to the success of others? Well they
are...For the more you assist others the more Allah assists you and the more
you forgive others the more He forgives you, the more you cover the faults of
others, the more He covers Your faults too, & the more You give to others
the more He gives to YOU! So you see, it IS about YOU, but there is really is
no you without me or them or us, We are in this together and that's why we
cohabit this earth. It's not about Pursuing success, it's about what success
Means to YOU. Whether it's fame, a title or a stash of money in your account or whether it is the positive
impact you've brought to the world, living true to your purpose on this earth.
If you ask me I would say its okay to be selfish...Love & Care about others
because YOUR life would have more meaning & be better, Help others because
Your Lord has asked you to & He would be pleased with YOU, Forgive & be
compassionate with others so He can forgive & be compassionate with YOU,
Inspire others to do Good, so He can grant YOU the reward for everytime they do
it & inspire others too.
If we all sat to truly think about ourselves we'll
find that we can't help but think about others too, for every word we speak,
decision we make and action we take affects the next person...To do right by
ourselves is to do right by the people, is to not hurt or oppress or be unjust
to anyone for that is a discredit to your own self...but we must not also
forget the things we owe to ourselves...we must not also forget that the circle
is not complete without ourselves in it, as much as we give our love &
kindness, we also deserve a share.
An empty vessel, they say, cannot give out
water. If we don't take care of our own selves, then how can we truly extend
the care to others without harming ourselves in which case the aim would be
defeated?
So yes be selfish my dear, but know that i am a part of you as you
are me.
